Watch my badassness!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=shWTnE5LGpw

Act 4

Interviewer: How did you feel when you found out that Romeo Montague was in love with your cousin, Juliet Capulet?

Tybalt: HATE and RAGE!!!! I wanted to go on a killing spree! ARRGGGG! Capulets and Montagues are not meant to be together. It doesn’t work that way.

Interviewer:  Tybalt, why did you feel that it was necessary to kill Mercutio?

Tybalt: That’s easy. I love to kill Montagues. They don’t deserve to live. I made it my life’s dream to rid the world of all Montagues. Now, seen, as I’m dead, I’ve left the fulfillment of my dream in the hands of Lord Capulet.

Also, Mercutio was egging me on. I thought it was necessary to teach him a lesson. No one messes with Tybalt and gets away with it!

Interviewer: In the past, you have been perceived as being the best and most dangerous fighter in Verona. Can you explain how Romeo managed to beat you?

Tybalt: It was merely a flaw. I wasn’t at my best that day. I am still the best fighter of all time. I was quite disappointed because I had spent months fantasizing ways I could kill Romeo. He got lucky, that’s all…

Interviewer: If you could go back to that day and change anything, would you??

Tybalt: To be honest, no I wouldn’t. As it turns out, Romeo is unhappier to be alive without Juliet than he would have been if I killed him. I want to cause Romeo as much pain and suffering as possible. Now Romeo and Juliet can never be together. Even if seeing Romeo suffer makes me EXTREMELY happy, I don’t understand why he is so upset. I gave him the greatest gift of all, depression. Hehehe

Interviewer: How is the after life treating you?

Tybalt: It’s quite hot down here thank you. I’m secretly plotting to overpower the devil and take control of all of Hell (ya, I’m just that awesome).

Act 3 The butterflies dance under the rainbow. :)

So there was gigantic fight, or two. Mercutio was all bathing in the street and he started a row, which is never a good idea to get into a fight with me. So we fought and I stabbed him repeatedly and violently, under his doorknob of a friend’s arm, Romeo. Unfortunately, Romeo didn’t take well to having his friend killed in front of his stupid little eyes, and decided to seek some revenge, damned bastard. He came, we fought, he won, I died. So I am telling you all of this from…down under. The climate is rather hot, which makes it a good place for raging, as you know I like to do. The dankish wagtail, Benvolio, looked upon my dead corpse and proclaimed “There lies that Tybalt.” I was defeated. Because of my death, I couldn’t slap that little miscreant for saying that. Death can be such a hassle. Have you tried avenging people when you can’t make contact with them? It is rather difficult. I have to settle with laughing silently at them as they suffer, but they will never know. My last remarks before I left this fluffy world was “Thou, wretched boy, that didst consort him here, Shalt with him hence.” I was rather enraged, as you might have guessed. I mean, this is me we’re talking about, and I was in the face of death. I saw my beautiful life flash before my eyes as his sword stroked my heart. Death is painful. I do believe that I said something along the lines of “Boy this shall not excuse the injuries that thou hast done for me” before I died. I suffered. I fear I may have gone soft in my death, but where is the fun in being raging when there is no one to hurt and scare? Thoughts of unicorns often float through my mind. They like to have tea with the bunnies. While the butterflies dance under the rainbow.

but in this case it is.

Act 2. There must be death...

How dare thee! Friar and nurse actually allow this marriage??? I'm pissed, as always, but more than usual! Friar must be losing his mind.... he is pretty old.... He thinks that the marriage will resolve the fight between us cool guys and those wombat Montagues. That is never going to happen!! It's impossible! Us humans, we can't live without hate, fighting and killing... well at least I can't. But seriously it’s in our nature. I will not allow this! Romeo will be dead tomorrow. I will make sure of it. I sent him a letter yesterday, challenging him to a one on one duel. He hasn't responded yet but it doesn't matter, I will force him to fight whether he likes it or not. Who's the coward now boys??? I will do as you say and put my words into action and my sword into that lover boy.

Maybe this marriage won’t be so bad. Maybe it will intensify the hate between the Capulets and those blasted Montagues. If this results in more fighting and more dying, I guess I have to say that I’m ok with it. As long as my family doesn’t get hurt in the process, then I’ll be happy, especially if I get to kill a Montague, or more. It would pain me to see my cousin, Juliet get hurt, but I can’t feel pain. I’m immune to it. Romeo is not immune to pain. I will make him feel the greatest pain he has ever felt in his life and more!!!! Muhahahaha.

Act 1-the near-death scene

There was another fight between my family and the Montagues. There was a little fight and then that damned little Benvolio loser showed up and tried to stop it. I was determined to kill him and end his pathetic peace keeping ways, but the Prince showed up before I got the chance. The Prince says that he will kill us all if we keep fighting, but I’d like to see him try and finish me off. I would destroy him in a second. My uncle had a party last night, and the little paunchy clay-brained bum-bailey snuck in. Don’t know how he managed it, but he brought some of his stupid little Montague friends to crash the party. The low life, Romeo, took a liking to my cousin, Juliet, as though he could actually have her. I was convinced that killing him was the best solution for everyone, but Capulet said that he must be endured, as though that were possible. He forgot that they don’t deserve to live, but he didn’t want a fight at his precious little party, so he let them live and continue to destroy the party, and our lives. He talks of peace, like the dumb Benvolio. You’d think they were related. The little bastard Romeo will pay dearly for his intrusion. The next party that my uncle hosts shall be Montague free, even if I have to kill every single one of them myself, and Capulet won’t side with the dead ones. If that stupid git Romeo goes near Juliet again, he shall die painfully, by my hand.